During my career as a sex therapist, I had the opportunity to sit with thousands of men while discussing their sexual feelings, sexual lives and fantasies. Obviously, I don’t know what it feels like to be a man, but I’ve had the honor of hearing the male perspective of sexual intercourse. And, although each man is different, of course, there are some common themes:
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Sex begins in the body. While women’s desire to have sex may be motivated by their mind, memory or emotional feelings of connection, for men, the desire is physical. Men have huge amounts of testosterone in their bodies, pushing them and driving them towards sexual expression. Erections sprout at the slightest provocation in young men. It’s hard to overestimate the way your body’s chemistry directs the psychology of your mind toward the sexual.
For men, sex is a hunger. The desire for sex is like the desire for chocolates. Every sexual episode has the exquisite possibility of a confection full of surprise, maybe soft creamy or rich in butter, maybe a little raw and bitter sweet or silky sweet. Your mind is captivated by the thought of an opportunity to feel delighted and surprised. One day is hardly complete without dessert.
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Sex is energy. Sexuality infuses the intimate relationships of a man with potential and enthusiasm. The hormonal energy gives him momentum and aggression to pursue the purpose and work of his life, and to persecute his partner. Push through the daily monotony, tempted by the fantasy of a sexual reward at the end of a difficult day.
Sex is emotion. It is the most exciting adventure of life. Your body is a great pleasure machine that you would like to enjoy at full speed. As orgasm is usually reliable and easy, a variety of sexual acts, positions and rhythms seem to be a fantastic way to explore and raise your gratification. Every flirt, smile, insinuation, well proportioned figure or sexual image, whether fantasized or real, is a blow to the male brain. Your brain waves increase in joy at the insinuation of something or someone who reminds you of sex.
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Sex is love. Sexual liberation makes men feel as if they were finally at home. After the wounds and challenges of the world, sex embodies love and attention, and provides relief and support. While he may be accused of “just wanting sex,” most men want and feel a much more emotional connection than a simple body release. Making love literally creates a deep feeling of attachment to your partner and stimulates relational generosity, faith and optimism. Being desired by your partner can be the most reassuring part of your relationship.
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Sex is the way love gives. The moment in which your partner is excited is often the moment that men describe as more sexually satisfying. It is disconcerting for men when they are called selfish because of their preference for sexual connection. In their hearts there is an expectation of mutual and exquisite bodily pleasure. She often invents and fantasizes about how to improve it for her, begging for information about her erotic desires so she can improve as a lover.
Ultimately, the male sex drive in a relationship is a gift; it is another path to love. You can Buy men’s health product online .
